The Daily 17/09/16;
screaming-bus-driver
Well here it is everyone  Toodles wanted me to share with the whole internet world, my bus hair day. Now be it that I cannot always get a 6 week hair cut, and yes I do stretch the limits sometimes …. but having said that, one of my embarrassing moments, I ride the same bus almost everyday back and forth to work. Usually the same passengers, we all are really close, we smile, and nod, and if that is sufficient, we have been known to get a little more personal with a wave and show your teeth kind of smile. But this day I get on the bus, do the usual social smile nod, yadda yadda, and one of the ladies spoke fairly loudly, “don’t you think it is time for a hair cut, you hair looks awful!”  First I thought she was talking to someone else, but nope, she singles me out, I mean you lady!   I couldn’t believe it, I rang the bell got off the bus quickly, I turned and I  could see her face against the glass! What the HEE HAW, what’s next ….they will probably want me to start shaving my legs!!!
-Gloria

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/RANT/ Ok ladies, lets have a talk. Most of us sit to pee. That being said, I’d really like to know why so often there is pee drops on the seat when you are done? Just what are you DOING in there?? Unless you are levitating on your magic carpet there is no excuse for this! Even if you practice the hover over he seat technique, how can your aim be so off?? If your aim is truly that bad then you are probably also peeing on yourself and your clothes. “SNIFF SNIFF what is that smell?? Oh Darlene, you peed on yourself again! Girl, can’t you sit yo ass down to pee? What are you, some kind of monster?” PROBABLE FACT: you are more likely to catch something from touching door knobs than you are from a toilet seat. DEFINITE FACT: you will get sick if you lick door knobs. Stop it you silly fool. Unless your bottom is covered with open sores it is unlikely there will be a portal for any infection. Public service announcement, if your bottom is covered in open sores go to a doctor immediately and stay out of public washrooms. In fact, stay out of the general public until you are better. Nobody needs what you have. Some advice if you are a seat pee-er. If you want to dribble go to the basketball court. Some places have seat covers. Failing this, you can lay TP down on the seat. DO IT. We live in a  civilized society. Let it be known if I could rub your face in your mess, I would. /RANT off/ -Toodles

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